Book excerpt: These writings are a celebration of the evolution of our habitat and its inhabitants from time immemorial to present day. Together with our singular appreciation for the most spoken word of all time, a word that conveys different emotions, has multiple meanings, a word that is never used out of context, always grammatically correct, spans cultural, geographical, political and national barriers, brings all communications to a level playing field. This book is dedicated to everyone who is misguided enough to believe the world has evolved au natural. Hopefully, once reading this literary milestone you will come to realise this worlds original inhabitants were put here by some Universal Interplanetary Council Correctional Department to facilitate their rehabilitation, all of these early settlers were undoubtedly mentally and/or criminally insane and have unwittingly spawned what we know today as a seething mass of institutionalised and certifiable nutters of which you are undoubtedly one.