Book excerpt: On 15th June 2011, an extraordinary event took place in Brixton, south London. On that day, an Irishman devoured two doner kebabs in a mere 1 minute and 59 seconds. What made this feat even more remarkable was the fact that he had already indulged in 13 pints of lager. Now, in a riveting account, the true story of the events leading up to this accomplishment is recounted by the protagonist, 'Johnny Two Kebabs.' In this 'prequel' Johnny invites us into his world. Prepare to be captivated as he unveils how he came to be known, among other things, as the 'conscious vigilante.' Not simply the tale of a gastronomic triumph, it is also the story of a man, fuelled by a fervent sense of justice, as he fearlessly tracks down and brings to justice a dangerous armed robber. This is the story of Johnny Two Kebabs.