Book excerpt: This entertaining and comprehensive guide includes more than 1,300 heartwarming, hilarious, cynical, and sentimental toasts for any party or occasion. Called upon to make a toast at your daughter’s dirthday? Your boss's baby shower? Your brother's wedding? Your sister's divorce? Don't worry about what to say. Pour everyone a drink and relax. Your wit is about to get sharpened for you... Featuring all the right words for all right occasions by Oscar Wilde, Charles Dickens, Dorothy Parker, Mark Twain, Groucho Marx, John F. Kennedy, Winston Churchill, W.C. Fields, Bette Davis, Jack London, Robert Frost, Ogden Nash, Humphrey Bogart, Ingrid Bergman, John Barrymore, P.J. O'Rourke, Miss Piggy, Emily Dickinson, William Shakespeare, Mae West, Walter Winchell, Socrates, Benjamin Franklin, Victor Hugo, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Gloria Steinhem and hundreds of others who never worried about being at a loss for words.