Book excerpt: Helene Thornton has lived a life of unequalled passion and hartache. In her fascinating memoirs she gives the definitive account of her daughter Paula Yates really was. From frail, lonely schoolgirl to voluptuous star of the stage and screen, wife, mother, lover, author and artist, in this dramtic autobiography. After a tough childhood in bleak post-war Blackpool where she suffered from bouts of debilitating sickness, at the hands of cruel bullies and from the impact of her mother's mential illness, Helene blossomed into a renowned beauty and went on to win Miss Blackpool 1954 where she first encountered TV producer and presenter Jess Yates. Joining the famous dancing troupe the Bluebell Girls, Helene toured Europe where she broke hearts and honed her dancing and acting skills before being reunited with Jess and embarking on a whirlwind and frequently steamy romance. After mere months, however, the fairy-tale marriage took a sinister and violent turn with Helene discovering one too many of Jess' secrets, and was forced to leave her husband with baby Paula in tow, as she battled life as a single mother, roaming Britain and then Europe in search of happiness and fulfillment. Writing candidly about the difficult mother-daughter relationship, Helene reveals her anguish at Paula's unsettled infancy and early signs of mental illness. She sets the record straight about one of Britain's best-loved - but least understood - stars, fondly recalling Paula's joy on meeting Bob Geldof, and writing of the childhood incidents that formed her relationships with family, friends and assoicates and the press. For the first time, she discusses the circumstances that lead to the revelation that Paula's true father was Hughie Green, and discloses the identities of some of her most cherished lovers. Explosive, moving, frank, but above all honest, Big Girls Don't Cry is a no-holds-barred account of the exciting highs and gut-wrenching lows of a life lived to a full.