Book excerpt: A marathon runner and writer for The Simpsons offers sage advice for those who want to push their limits . . . even if they lag behind everyone else. In How to Lose a Marathon, Joel Cohen takes readers on a step-by-step journey from being a couch potato to becoming a couch potato who can finish a marathon. Through a hilarious combination of running tips, narrative, illustrations, and infographics, Cohen breaks down the misery that is forcing yourself to run. From the agony of chafing to the best times to run, explaining the phenomenon known as the “Oprah Line,” and exposing the torture that is a premarathon expo, Cohen acts as your satirical guide to every aspect of the runner’s experience. Offering both real advice and genuine commiseration with runners of all skill levels, How to Lose a Marathon lets you know that even if you believe that the “runner’s high” is a complete myth, you can still survive all 26.2 miles of a marathon.