Book excerpt: “Where there is feeling there can be no logic. That would be a paradox, wouldn’t it? This, in a nutshell, is why men and women do not understand each other. In reality, the ‘unspoken’ or ‘implied’ is the basis of communication, and therefore also of seduction and the maintenance of relationships”. Why do men and women not understand each other? Why do conflicts and misunderstandings arise? Is it possible to generate more authentic and emotional connections with others? In this short and valuable essay, the theme of the difficulty of communication between men and women is addressed. It contains techniques and solutions for finding a ‘common code’ between the two sexes: the holy grail of all success in the sentimental sphere. TABLE OF CONTENTS Synopsis WHY MEN AND WOMEN DON'T UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER: HOW TO FIND A COMMON CODE Owls Are Not What They Seem Leave no Room for Misunderstandings The Meta-Message and the 'Unspoken': Nothing is As It Seems Story of a Girl Terrorized by the Words 'I Love You The Reason Men and Women Don't Understand Each Other Men and Women Speak Different Languages The Bad News is That You Are Already Communicating Silences and Monosyllabic Messages How I Turned an Introverted Girl into a Loudmouth We only put up walls to defend ourselves Just a Matter of Time The Basics of Communication: Feedback We are still today dominated by Primordial Impulses Kindness is Revolution Investment and Balance in Communication The Power of Silence and Incompleteness What matters is always what the other person understands. APPENDIX 7 Ideal Features for Your Communication Raising the bar (Paraphrase of Emotions) Exercises in Emotional Paraphrasing Do You Only Communicate With Silence and Anger? Conflict Management in Relationships Are You Dealing With an Introvert? Interpreting Subtext in Communication Why Men and Women Don't Understand Each Other: How to Find a Common Code The Author