Book excerpt: I wrote this book for me, the way it happened, and so maybe it's also for you. I learned that rehab is not just about helping people. The help is there, if you need it-but you have to be able to pay for it. If you can't, and you really need help, then you are in a world of trouble. If you can pay, then maybe there will always be a reason to get you in. In my case, I had to go-or end my career. I was lucky because I could pay, so I can continue the work I have chosen and love. I met some good people and fine counselors, and learned some useful things. But it wasn't all benevolent-much was dogmatic, and sometimes malicious. At times, the rehab providers wielded their clout in a nasty way. I resisted, then submitted, and then complied, learning what I could along the way. And I wrote it down. This is the story.