Book excerpt: With a brand new introduction by Eddie Braben and including never-before-seen material Morecambe and Wise charmed a nation for decades and at their height commanded TV audiences that could only be matched by the moon landings and the 1966 World Cup final. Often called the third member of Morecambe and Wise, the late Eddie Braben was the quiet genius behind their best-loved jokes. Here, collected together for the first time, is a celebration of the finest repartee Braben ever penned for them - the banter between Eric and Little Ern, lines from those horrendous plays what Ernie wrote, and the unforgettable celebrity encounters with such names as Glenda Jackson, Andre Previn and, of course, Des O'Connor. The perfect Christmas stocking-filler for Eric and Ernie fans young and old. Ernie: Can you remember the first words you spoke in the theatre? Eric: I'll never forget them. How could I? 'This way, please! Programmes!...' After a couple of months came my big break. That great Shakespearian actor and dance band leader, Sir Lawrence Olivier came to the theatre. Ernie: What happened? Eric: He came up to me. My heart stopped. He said, ' Young man, have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?' Ernie: What did you say? Eric: I said, 'Only two of them.' He said, 'Which ones?' I said, 'Romeo and Juliet.' So he put me in his next play. Ernie: What was it about? Eric: It was about thirty minutes too long.