Book excerpt: DIVWith a chatty voice and sarcastic style, The Faker's Guide to the Classics condenses the great—but long and often complicated—novels, plays, and poems into bite-size nuggets of info that are easy to digest, cutting out the bloated analysis and nauseating debate of other reading guides. From Anna Karenina and Beowulf to Ulysses and Wuthering Heights, each of the 100 books profiled here is a classic that everyone talks about but only hardcore lit majors have actually read. Now, with The Faker's Guide to the Classics, you, too, can: Reminisce about books you were supposed to read for class but didn't; fudge literary discussions at fancy parties; impress a date with your incredible knowledge and wit; and cut through the ivory tower of world letters to read like a ninja! Each entry contains: a quick and dirty narrative description of plot points and overall story, including significant twists and surprise endings, told with humorous brevity; famous quotes from each work, accompanied by smartass responses; the original cover or an illustration conveying the work’s tone (or lack thereof). Brief author bios, including misdeeds and scandals, add illuminating and occasionally disgusting background to each work. All of the text appears in simple, contemporary English, so it’s easy to understand—and short enough to tweet. With this must-have guide, there’s no more need to worry whether a reference to Miss Havisham is an insult or to wonder what happened to Moby-Dick. Not reading the classics has never been easier! /div