Book excerpt: Finding love is easier than you think, and more within your control than you realize! Written by a clinical psychologist, this practical and friendly guide to finding the right mate is filled with proven strategies, expert advice, and exercises to help you clarify your dating priorities, stop inventing problems, and start seeking lasting love. Filled with wisdom, understanding, and warmth, this handy volume reveals the three "Golden Rules" of dating, ways to change your negative attitudes and expectations, the best model for choosing a mate, tips for screening strangers, and methods for identifying and evaluating sexual problems early in a relationship. Decide what qualities and characteristics in a mate are really important to you. Overcome obstacles like "the audience effect," which causes you to view people through others' eyes and "a fixed personal picture," which rules out potential mates based on certain attributes, and more.