Book excerpt: A book that celebrates how great—and gross—dogs can be. Do you take your dog to parties so that you know you'll have someone to hang out with? Does your dog eat better than you do? Do you have a doggy daycare report card stuck to your fridge? Do you regularly remove various disgusting things from your dog's mouth and hardly wince? Then this book is for you! I Am About to Lick Your Human is a hilarious collection of doggo sentiments and situations paired with fun and playful illustrations. It includes a catalogue of all the things you'll pull out of your dog's mouth, confessions of a dog lover, and a checklist for the soon-to-be dog owner (number one: no aversion to bodily fluids). This is the ultimate gift for canine lovers that celebrates all that is good (and bad) about dog ownership.