Book excerpt: Relive the angst. From starter girlfriends to escapist fantasies to delusional attempts to stand out amongst their peers, Mortified: Love Is a Battlefield revisits the boundlessly embarrassing topic of childhood love, uncovering priceless artifacts of authentic teen angst that tell of unrequited crushes, awkward hookups, odd celebrity infatuations, and all manner of romantic catastrophes. The now older (and allegedly wiser) authors of these letters, lyrics, and journals bravely share their shame in stories that range from sweetly hopeful to borderline psychotic. Everyone who ever obsessed over whether that guy or girl in algebra class liked them, or, y'know, liked them liked them, will relish this funny and touching valentine to our collective past