Book excerpt: From playing hopscotch on the black and white tiles of the kitchen floor, attempting a stealth purchase of feminine protection for his wife, imitating Mighty Mouse by saving the day each morning as he bounds down the stairs or secretly being taped by Dateline NBC as he watches a "Monday Night Football" game, Heidi Rice's husband, who she affectionately calls "husband-head", is an eight-year-old, football addict trapped in a man's body and a great subject for a humor columnist. For ten years, Heidi Rice has entertained readers of all ages with her weekly "Fried Rice" humor column in the Glenwood Springs (Colo.) Post Independent, detailing life with her spouse. Now peer into the lives of the Rice's-a baby boomer couple who don't have babies but share a lot of laughs-in this sixty-column collection of her favorites. From football to family, housekeeping to holidays, there is something in Skully Says Shut It! that will assure you that (sigh) you aren't the only weirdoes in the world.