Book excerpt: What's it like to go from sitting two rows behind George W. Bush in church to explaining ass-less chaps to a two-year-old while wandering through the Castro neighborhood of San Francisco? Robin Dutton-Cookston grew up in a Texas town where the only chaps were found at the annual rodeo, yet she found herself peeing on the pregnancy stick while still unpacking the boxes in her hipster San Francisco apartment. Life in the mama-lane quickly straddled the great divide between red and blue states, and Robin learned to blend new age street smarts and deep-fried southern hospitality when raising her daughter. Take a trip to San Francisco Mamaland and sneak a peek into an odyssey of bumbling motherhood. It all takes place in a city where what passes as ordinary-same-sex mommies and daddies, creative facial piercings, rabid political rallies, and professional families who can't afford to buy a house-evokes gasps of shock and awe from folks back in Texas. On the way Robin covers universal parenting themes common to many mamas and daddies: breastfeeding chaos, naptime battles, life transitions, the quest for a sense of home, and the need teach her California child the subtle difference between east and west Texas barbeque sauce.