Book excerpt: In Southwestern Oklahoma in 1953, nineteen-year-old Benjamin Bird had not yet learned how amazingly diverse human sexuality could be. Growing up in a devout rural Christian family who believed that homosexuality was an abomination justifying death, he dared not reveal his yearning for sexual intimacy with certain attractive males in his small circle of acquaintances, for fear of being attacked or shunned.Because Benjamin was also sexually attracted toward certain desirable females and because he shared his beloved family's belief in Christian principles, he hoped and prayed that he could overcome his homosexual propensity.Ben's confusion over his sexuality occurred more than a generation before the gay rebellion at New York's Stonewall Inn took place, and more than two generations before homosexuals could legally marry. Ben felt he had no alternative but to conform to a heterosexual life style, so he sought a formal education to prepare him for a fulfilling career that would afford him an opportunity to prosper, marry a desirable young woman, and raise his own family.This story traces Benjamin's journey into adulthood, a journey of challenges, achievements, failures, self-doubt, discovery, confrontation and intrusive family influence--a search for truth, faith, and courage to be who God created him to be.