Book excerpt: One of the nation's top experts on how to improve complex family dynamics, Leonard Felder, Ph.D., has been counseling couples for more than 20 years. In his experience, the inklings of worry and moments of boredom that many individuals feel in their good relationships have to be addressed sooner rather than later to head off the loss of what could be a great relationship. Dr. Felder has found that by following the eight specific and realistic steps he outlines to address the problem areas that most often drive mates apart, couples can overcome the odds and create a healthy, immensely satisfying intimacy. A wealth of anecdotes from the author's practice provide fresh perspectives on such key issues as learning when to be flexible (and when you've gone too far!), becoming a caring lover, using the critical moments of "re-entry" after work or to increase intimacy, and coming through for your mate in a crisis. Upbeat and non-blaming, this is a book you can urge your mate to read without fear of provoking a fight or hurt feelings. Though it offers advice to both partners in traditional or same-sex couples, one of Dr. Felder's special gifts as a therapist is his ability to reach men and get them to take a more proactive role in strengthening their relationships.